Mark Brown offers “man law” contributions a la the beer commercial from “Pittsburgh John,” a friend:
• If it's not broken, don't fix it (not just a law, a commandment.)
• If you can't stretch out all the way, it's not a couch.
• If you're not a professional bike rider, don't wear the shorts.
Etc. “Let me hear from you,” he tells male readers. Hmmm. This is today’s column, Oct. 1. Smart fella, Brown. That closing request will be good for another column. And if he doesn’t hear from anyone, he can go to Lipstick Chronicles for Sept. 22, where Rebecca the Bookseller has a bunch of suggestions from “several men from varying backgrounds and geographic locations,” with helpful commentary:
* Man Law on Food: Regardless of weather, the grill is always the cooking appliance of first choice. A Man from the midwest contributes: further, salmon is a fish, and not a color. And a Navy Man serving overseas reminds us that No Man shall use a utensil of any kind to eat ribs.
Etc. Such a deal. Brown has his second column written already. Rebecca asked for more laws too. Maybe she and Brown can collaborate. If this doesn’t work out, he can fish around in REO Horror Story: Man Law - Don’t Let Beer Cans Pile to the Ceiling, also of Sept. 22. I’ll bet there are other places too.